The death of my biological father is not a shock.
As much as he tried to sugar coat it for me, and say he was just sick, I knew he was dying.
2 summers ago when Daniel and I went out there to L.A. to see him, he would frequently excuse himself from us, and vomit black blood.
We all knew it was coming. As sure as the sun falls at night, we all must die.
The only problem I'm having is wondering what to feel.
I know I'm kind of alone in this. Not many have been through my exact situation.
It's like reading only book 2 of a 3 part series. He wasn't present for 18 years of my life, but for the past few, he had become a great friend of mine.
You read that correctly. I view Sha Ahwa, Phillip, my biological father as a good friend. He was a much better friend to me than a parent. Don't get bent, don't get offended. That's just how it is.
He held a thousand secrets, that I'll never know now. And I think I'm ok with that.
I was hoping to fly out, to be there for the family in the wake of the tragedy. Unfortunately we were unable to afford it. It's looking like if I do go out there, it will be via Greyhound. Whirl wind adventure, here I come.
Thank you for your Time.
Dwp
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